Where were you when the idea for your book was initially ignited? Who was the first person you told? How did they respond?
I haven’t written a book – yet. I haven’t been struck by the lightning bolt. Haven’t felt the siren song of the muse. I don’t have an outline. I don’t even have an outline of an outline. No hero or villain. No plot. No message, no moral, no shirt, no shoes – no service.
I didn’t know so many other members of the challenge would be book authors. I hadn’t thought about it when I joined the challenge. I’m not really thinking about it now. However, a challenge is a challenge, and a prompt is a prompt. I’m going to try to make lemonade out of this one.
What would I title a book, if I were to write it? I can think of two or three titles. Two or three topics. I could write the definitive guide on “Saying Yes to Your Perfect Dress”. Believe me, in only 3 years working at a specialty dress shop I have enough material to give any reality show a run for its money. It would be a lot of fun to write. I would not name names – but those of you who show up to try on ball gowns after spending 2 hours in Aerobics class know who you are! I think it would be a best seller – because someone out there is always going to be looking for that perfect dress, and I would love to be their guide on their trek into the world of taffeta, bugle beads and bustiers.
Or, I could finally blow the lid off the can of worms and write “Confessions of an Evil Stepmother”. Every one out there who has spent the night chewing on their pillow because they feel like a complete failure as a stepmother will share in the agony of my defeat. Every soul sister who has bitten her tongue clear through because it “isn’t their business” will raise their fists to the skies in a show of solidarity for the 100,000th time I DIDN’T give my opinion. I’m sure the chapter on “Why Not to Take Your Ex’s Wife out in the Back and Beat Her Senseless at Your Daughter’s Wedding” will make me an instant favorite on Twitter. Or not. After all, everybody has pretty much the same stories – only the names have been changed to protect the innocent. The fact that I can laugh at the whole, long journey is, really, the greatest award of all.
I suppose the quickest way for me to make the New York Times Top 10 Books list would be for me to just take the stuff I already have done in the past year for my radio show, put it all together in a book and call it “An Average Woman in a Superwoman World”. I have the material all ready and waiting to be polished up and packed off to the printer. My observations on our world, how it has changed in my lifetime, and what I see as our average, everyday lives being transformed by our own superpowers, if only we could channel them. Who could resist that message of humor and hope?
Ok, fun time is over. Unlike how I see most of my fellow contest participants, I am just an average woman writing about what I see. That is really who I am. Just some middle aged, vertically challenged woman who sees all these amazing people out there, doing amazing things, conquering the world on an hourly basis, while I hope I made it out of the house with matching shoes on my aching feet. I have my moments of jealousy – who doesn’t? The tooth marks in my steering wheel cover are testimony to all those perfect women who have sauntered unharmed past me in the supermarket parking lot. No knock off Vuitton bags have been injured during the events I attend and subsequently describe for my listeners.
Indeed, I have found that the superwomen I have met are actually warm, wonderful, talented, truly lovely women who are mostly a little astonished that they have done all that cool stuff! Not only that, they are all generous spirits who truly enjoy helping other women achieve their own highest goals. Every one I meet gives me renewed faith that the power to make my life amazing is just over the horizon. That when I wake up, I will find the key in my own back yard, just like Dorothy. It is why I keep doing what I do. Because I believe it is important for us all to share the laughter and power and joy of life, if for no other reason than because the rest of the news is so miserable!
I know that the conception, nurture and birthing of a book is anything but a snap. I still can’t imagine myself actually writing a book. So many chapters in my 57 years. So many paths, so many stories, so many ways to go. I find it boggling to consider all those chapters, and how I would possibly get organized long enough to make them into something other people might enjoy reading.
I guess it is good to know I have options, should I ever pull my average self together and take a stab at it.
Sandi Tuttle is the host of the Blog Talk Radio show “An Average Woman in a Superwoman World” (http://www.blogtalkradio.com/sandi-tuttle).